Dear WISY,
I've been trying to push my music in the soca scene for a while now and it seems the harder I work, the less I accomplish. I'm from an island that is dancehall dominated and and I swear every time I tell someone I sing soca, they tell me I was born on the wrong island. Since when does geographic location determine what sort of music you should sing?
I really want to break the stereotype and prove everyone wrong, but there is absolutely no support for a soca artist in this country.
I would appreciate it if some of your readers could leave some advice for me. They don't have to be in the same situation either. I just want to know how to proceed with soca.
Thank you.
Signed,
I am Soca
Dear WISY,
My boyfriend and I have been together for a few weeks and we've started to become more and more open about our sexual preferences and fantasies. We've discussed our views on inviting an extra person in the bedroom and I always assumed he was referring to another female. I was shocked and appalled when he confessed that he wanted a man to join us. I told him I wasn't comfortable with that and his attitude changed toward me.
He is no longer in the mood for sex and he doesn't spend as much time with me.
Do you think I overreacted when he requested a male companion?
Signed,
Shocked and Appalled
Dear WISY,
I am writing for advice on my family situation. I used to be very close with my brother but we fell out a few weeks ago and everybody in my family is saying I should be the bigger person and apologize to him. I don't see the need for me to apologize to someone who intentionally hurt me and has secretly been jealous of me for years.
My brother is gay, well beyond gay because he wants a sex change and he secretly hated me for being a woman. He loved me and hated me at the same time but I guess his hate became too much for him to keep inside and it bubbled over and he began discussing my secrets with others and when something bad happened to me, he secretly glorified it.
I have been nothing but supportive to him and his wishes but for some reason he hated me. I loaned him my clothes and make up when he wanted to secretly dress as a woman and I never told anyone. But now everyone thinks I'm the bad guy because I cursed him out when I found out he was discussing me with others. They are all blinded by the victim role he likes to play but I see through the B.S. and I will never forget how he betrayed me.
Am I wrong for wanting to stay away from him? I don't trust him. He's family but I don't care.
Signed,
Hurt by SHim
Dear WISY,
I want you to reply to this please. I really need some advice. I am in a situation that I know I should not be in but I can't help myself.
I am in love with my sister's husband and I believe he loves me back. One night I was spending the night at their house because my mother was getting on my nerves. I was asleep in the guest room and I felt someone come into bed with me. At first I thought it was my sister but then I felt a manly hand touch me. I was scared and I turned to look at who it could be because my mind was telling me it was an intruder. To my surprise it was my sister's husband. Before I could question him, he began kissing me on my neck and on my arms and I was instantly turned on. I asked him where my sister was and he told me she was already gone to work. You can imagine what happened next and I began to spend more and more time at their house just so I could sleep with him.
My sister is not suspicious at all but I am beginning to feel terrible about the situation. I want to tell him to leave me alone but it feels so good to have him in my arms.
Please, I need some help with this and don't judge me.
Signed,
Falling for my sister's man
Dear WISY,
Am I the only one who thinks that women are way too hard on each other? We fight and bring each other down and we fail to see that if we work together we could dominate this world. I've heard that statistics say that there is a man shortage and because of this women settle for less than ideal relationships. We become extremely territorial and when we find our men stepping out on us we even allow our them to sleep with other women as long as they come home at night.
I try my hardest not to get pulled into such a mindset but I've been finding it increasingly more difficult to avoid the ignorance. I am dating a guy who I know is involved with someone else. He doesn't admit it but I know he is cheating. The other woman called me a few times to inform me of their relationship and instead of arguing with her like she wanted me to, I just said "ok, no problem.". I am determined not to fight with her. I want her to realize that he is JUST A MAN and not worth the fuss.
I don't want to leave him though. He is everything I've ever asked for and I think that he just might realize that he need not look elsewhere for fulfillment and then our relationship can move on to the next level.
Am I delusional?
Signed,
Tolerance
Dear WISY,
I am a very successful lady but my success comes with stigma. By day, I am a stay at home mom with a husband and two gorgeous children. At night, I dance at a club across the state line. Nobody knows about my night life activities. My husband works at night and I hire a babysitter to watch the children until I get back.
I started dancing after a friend of mine suggested it when I complained that things were tight as far as money was concerned. I gave it a shot and I've been dancing three nights out of the week. This has been going on for almost two years now. I have gotten expensive gifts and more money than I know what to do with. I've had trouble hiding these things from my husband but I am comforted by this blanket of money sitting in a separate account in case things get tough again.
Now that I have more than enough money, I have considered quitting the dance scene but I have grown to love it. Every time I go, I say this is my last night but by the end of my set, I am so high off of the attention that I can't see my self leaving.
I would just like to get some opinions on what you would do if in this situation.
Thanks.
Signed,
After Dark
Dear WISY,
I've been seeing this man for a couple months now and I'm only involved with him because I am trying to make my ex jealous. The man I'm seeing is my ex's family member and they used to be very close. You are probably wondering why I would do this just to make him jealous, well the answer is, my ex slept with my best friend and got her pregnant. They now have a son and had the nerve to ask me to be the god mother. Of course I refused and cursed them out on top of it. What kind of people are they? It's like it isn't enough that they hurt me by sleeping together and having a baby but now want me to be god mother too? I believe they are intentionally trying to send me off the deep end. So, is it wrong that I am doing something to get back at him too? In a crazy way, I feel that getting back at him this way is helping me cope with my deep pain.
Should I stop thinking this way and move on?
Signed,
Tit for Tat
