I Had a One Night Stand

Dear WISY,

I just got out of a relationship, and I've been very sad and depressed about it.  My friends have been very helpful with trying to cheer me up, and we all went out to the club to have some fun.

As soon as I got there, I noticed a guy in the line staring at me.  He was really good looking and I hoped to see him inside.  I saw him and we danced and he bought me a couple of drinks.  At the end of the night, I went home with him.  The next morning I woke up in his bed, and he told me it was time for me to go.  I thought we would at least have sex one more time or breakfast.  He hasn't even called me.

I feel even more horrible now.  I don't know what to do to feel better.  Please help me.

Signed,
Man Trouble

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WISY's Response:

Dear Man Trouble,

Slow it down, home girl.  Allow yourself the time to heal.  Getting under a new man doesn't always help you get over an old one.  I know you were looking for someone to come along and be Prince Charming, but you won't find that with a one night stand.

The most important thing for you to do now is to partake in activities which will help you bounce back from the hurt.  If you're religious, pray.  If you're spiritual, meditate.  Find your happy place again.  Go see family, spend time with close friends, immerse yourself in esteem building activity until you feel comfortable in your own company again.

Once you're good, by all means, start dating again.

Walk good,
#TeamWISY

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Am I Jealous?

Dear WISY, 

3 days ago my significant other and I had an issue.  I asked her if there was anything she was hiding from me in her phone that would make me look at her differently.  She said no, but I had a gut feeling that something was off.  I went to sleep to try and sleep the feeling off, but still felt like something was wrong.  So, I went out to the living room where she followed me to ask what was wrong.  I told her I feel like you’re hiding something.  She asked if she should go get her phone.  I said yes. We got it and looked through some of her threads.  There was a picture of her and her first child's father.  The way they looked in the picture made me feel uncomfortable.  I told her I'd appreciate it if she didn't take pics like that with people she has been with.  She told me the picture was innocent but it looks like something else.  Now I’m being called jealous, insecure and controlling?

What are your thoughts?

Signed,

Uncomfortable

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WISY’s Response:

Dear Uncomfortable,

The picture you sent is very suggestive and inappropriate.  If I didn’t know any better, I’d assume they were a couple – a happy couple at that.  Sometimes people use emotionally degrading words such as jealous, insecure and controlling to deflect their wrongdoing.  From where I stand, all I can see is a man trying to protect his relationship.

On the other hand, she did offer up her phone to you.  If she thought there were any pictures or messages in her phone that would jeopardize your relationship, I don’t think she would be so willing.  It may all be harmless like she says, and she may not be clear on boundaries.  That’s something to consider as well.

In any case, the picture is inappropriate.  Her response should not have been to attack your character.  Instead, she should have apologized and worked to dispel any doubt you may have.

Walk good,

#TeamWISY

He Did What to His Sister??

Caution: Disturbing post.

Dear WISY,

I am writing to you about my sister who is married and has three kids and a lovely husband.

Anyway, me and my wife separated and my sister came to stay with me to comfort me.  One night I put 5 viagra pills in my drink because I was going to see a escort for sex, but my sister drank my drink by mistake and came on to me strong sexually.  Because my sister is pretty and sexy I started kissing my sister and we made love every way possible.

In the morning my sister was shocked and confused and said never again, but I forced my sister that morning.  I like my sister, it was the best ever.

Should I carry on with my sister?  She likes it now and she calls me, but her husband nearly caught us.

Signed,
Brother

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WISY's Response:

Dear Brother,

First, is this a prank??? Second, WTF! I had to remove some of what you wrote because I don't want my readers to vomit!  You're sick, your sister is sick, and you both need intensive mental and spiritual healing.

You're seriously asking if you should continue???!!! Go get a head evaluation, dude.

I hope you're arrested for incest and rape, and I hope your brother in law beats the crap out of you, divorces your sister and takes those three children out of her care.

Go get help!

Can't even say "Walk Good" to you.

YUCK!

#TeamWISY

I Read Her Text Messages

Dear WISY,

I've been seeing my girlfriend for a few months.  I love her and I see a future with her.  She is my first real girlfriend, and because of her I am more comfortable with my sexuality.  The other day she left her phone on the bathroom counter and I went into the bathroom and couldn't resist the urge to go through her phone.  I went through her messages and found out that she is bisexual and is still communicating with guys while we're together.

From her phone messages, I found out that she wants real 🍆.  She said she's tired of me acting like a man and she's ready for something different.  I feel like she's going to leave soon, but she hasn't been communicating anything to me.  She hasn't been acting different or anything.  I'm so confused.

Do I confront her about what I found?  How do I continue like I didn't see all of that?

Signed,
Girlfriend

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WISY's Advice:

Dear Girlfriend,

It's never a good idea to snoop, especially if you're not prepared to deal with anything you're not ready to see.  So, now you have to tell your girlfriend that you decided to go through her phone and you saw some things that made you uncomfortable and confused.  Ask her to be honest with you about her intentions with you.  If she hasn't been showing signs then she may be trying to stick it out with you.  It's also possible that she has difficulty expressing her needs, and will use this opportunity as her ticket out.  Just use this conversation to gain as much clarity as possible.  What happens next is totally up to you.

Walk good,
#TeamWISY
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