Monday, September 17, 2018

My Husband Won't Let Me Go Out Alone

Dear WISY,

I am having issues with my husband.  He is becoming more and more attached to me.  He doesn't want me to go out with my friends and he doesn't go out with his friends without dragging me along.  We used to have separate lives when it came to socializing, but I got too drunk one time and my sister revealed what I had done in front of my husband and claimed she involved him because she was concerned.  I think she did it because she secretly is jealous of me and my marriage.  However, her plan backfired and instead of him wanting to leave me, he has attached himself to me like a parasite.  I can't do anything without him tagging along!

What should I do to get him to go back to the way we were?

Signed,
I Need Freedom
WISY's Advice:

Dear INF,

Once you break a plate, you can glue it back together, but it'll never ever be the same plate again.  It'll be full of cracks and chips.  The same goes for the trust in your relationship with your husband.  I'm not sure what you did, but whatever it was scared your husband so much that he feels the need to be a part of all your social activities.  He's afraid of losing you or he's afraid of you embarrassing yourself again.  It's your job to regain his trust.

I think you should talk with him about what happened.  Explain that it was an unfortunate occurrence of over intoxication and tell him that it won't happen again...and mean it.  If he still has trouble letting go, you should seek professional help.  Consistent sessions of couples therapy will be extremely helpful for you.

Your husband also needs to understand that smothering is unhealthy.  Balance is key.  I hope you all work things out soon.

Your sister is not the issue here, so I won't address that.

Walk good,
#TeamWISY

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