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One day, I spoke to one of his friends about groupies in general and he had the balls to tell me that I shouldn’t worry about the chicks that may hunt my man because even if he does sleep with them he is always so excited to come home to me at the end of it all. He told me that my man expresses his love for me all the time and that nobody respects the groupies so I shouldn’t allow their existence to upset me.
Dear WISY,
I am the girlfriend of an
entertainer. I don’t want to go too much
in detail about what type of entertaining he does, but let’s just say that he
is successful with his career and his popularity is growing daily. Anyway, I know that being the significant
other of an entertainer usually means that there will be INsignificant others
that he will be involved with on the road.
If I could I would travel with him wherever he goes but my schedule does
not permit.
I usually do a very good job
of keeping off of his social media sites and if I do happen to take a look, I
try my best to not get jealous of the comments and the pictures. However, the last few times that I’ve looked
there is this one groupie who keeps popping up.
I asked him about it and he said that she is someone who works with
numerous entertainers and aides them with their travel and coordination
needs. I am not stupid. I can see the lust in her eyes and the want
for my man. I can see the way she grips
on to him as if he belongs to her. I
know she is not just an employee for the road crew. She is something way more and I feel the need
to continue monitoring the situation.
One day, I spoke to one of his friends about groupies in general and he had the balls to tell me that I shouldn’t worry about the chicks that may hunt my man because even if he does sleep with them he is always so excited to come home to me at the end of it all. He told me that my man expresses his love for me all the time and that nobody respects the groupies so I shouldn’t allow their existence to upset me.
I hear all that and I would
actually be ok with it but I feel like this groupie is special. She might be sneaking in to his heart and I’m
afraid that she will replace me. The reality
is that the industry comes with a lot of heart ache and pain for the
wife/girlfriend of an entertainer and I believe the men should do everything
they can to protect their women from feeling this hurt. My ultimate wish would be for him to be
faithful while he’s out working but I know that’s damn near impossible. He’s a man and he is flattered by the
attention and he thinks with his lower head.
Moreover he is a West Indian man and sadly our culture tolerates
unfaithful men.
My question is, is it
better to leave him and be lonely (I know I would be lonely because I love him
so much that I can’t even imagine seeing someone else at this point) or should
I make myself accept what is going on and stay with him in the name of love? Keep in mind that we have a child and both
options can be damaging to the child.
Signed,
Industry Wifey
i totally understand how you feel... to be quite frank i am not giving no woman the satisfaction by leaving my man because of them.... men will be men in or out of the music industry...i say stick with your man, but let him know how you feel and hopefully he s understanding. think of all the good things , no relationship is perfect as long as you respect his career and he respects your feelings. good luck!!!
ReplyDeleteI dont know y u r writing in. You know dam well u r not going to leave him. Maybe u are just hopin that somebody gonna figure out who u talking about and then reveal everyting. Stop stalk u man & get all heated bc u know u not going nowhere. Keep sharing with he groupies. a bayyy
ReplyDeleteDear Wifey,
ReplyDeleteIs it better to leave or to stay, you ask. Well, you alone can determine the best course of action for yourself and what you can tolerate, i.e. your FT (F*ckery Threshold). As you try to make that decision, you may want to consider a few things.
You must ask yourself: do I want a relationship in which I must maintain constant surveillance? Am I ok with gathering intelligence on the man who I am supposed to be in a relationship with?
If you answered yes to any of the above questions, you should seek employment with the CIA or FBI and at least get compensated for your clandestine efforts.
As you consider your FT, allow me to clear up some misconceptions.
#1 – Regardless of the industry (entertainment, construction, finance, etc), women are attracted to men with money because we understand that money is equitable with power. Do not make the mistake in believing that entertainers are somehow under different temptations. It is not the work that brings temptation; it is the money and the appearance of money.
Many entertainers (in the music industry, for example) do a show, perform their set, and go home – alone. For some, it is simply work. For others, it is the fast and loose lifestyle that they embrace wholeheartedly. Yes, it is possible to have a faithful relationship, regardless of the work you do. People, including entertainers, do it every day.
#2 – There is no such thing as “special groupie.” A groupie is a groupie is a groupie. Some are ambitious and feel that with proper planning, they can be elevated to the status of girlfriend and even wife. However, that is up to the object of her desire (in this case, your man) to either elevate her, or ignore her, which is what you hope your man would do. A groupie is simply an opportunist. She may try to replace you, but again, that is up to the man that stands between the two (or three or more) of you.
My dear, this situation is not about you, he, and she; it is about you and he. If you give him the slightest impression that being unfaithful to you is acceptable, he will be unfaithful – and expect your cooperation.
Does he love you in the manner that you love him? In all situations, words must be supported by corresponding actions. If his actions do not support his words, a conflict exists within the man himself and he seemingly is in a place that he cannot reasonably give you his best. Love is more than a robust PayPal account and some pretty earrings. Yes, West Indian culture seems to embrace the ridiculous phenomenon of “man-sharing.” Believe me; I have seen all the data citing man shortage world-wide, but the truth is you can get another man. Don’t concern yourself with what WI culture tolerates; it is more important to determine what YOU will tolerate.
My question to you is this: if you believe that your man remaining faithful to you is “damn near impossible”, why bother? Why spend the time and energy? Yes, loneliness is a beast to deal with and no one wants to be alone, but this is where you decide your FT and what you are willing to endure and for how long. The only way a decision to leave would damage your child is if you deliberately refuse or deny him his parental rights to actively parent and support the child.
Take all those things into consideration and come up with what is best for you and your child.
Walk good,
#TeamWISY
LMAO at anonymous No.2. lol. but on a serious note, gyal stick wid u man. when other women fling them leg open I know its hard for a man to refuse, just think of a kid in a candy store with free candy! but if u ah de wife, and u dont want to leave him then dont..do whats gonna make u happy in the end. cause if you follow anybodys advice and leave him, and end up miserable, u still wont be happy. you might even blame them. so "follow your heart"
ReplyDelete