Monday, December 11, 2017

Am I Jealous?

Dear WISY, 

3 days ago my significant other and I had an issue.  I asked her if there was anything she was hiding from me in her phone that would make me look at her differently.  She said no, but I had a gut feeling that something was off.  I went to sleep to try and sleep the feeling off, but still felt like something was wrong.  So, I went out to the living room where she followed me to ask what was wrong.  I told her I feel like you’re hiding something.  She asked if she should go get her phone.  I said yes. We got it and looked through some of her threads.  There was a picture of her and her first child's father.  The way they looked in the picture made me feel uncomfortable.  I told her I'd appreciate it if she didn't take pics like that with people she has been with.  She told me the picture was innocent but it looks like something else.  Now I’m being called jealous, insecure and controlling?

What are your thoughts?

Signed,
Uncomfortable

WISY’s Response:

Dear Uncomfortable,

The picture you sent is very suggestive and inappropriate.  If I didn’t know any better, I’d assume they were a couple – a happy couple at that.  Sometimes people use emotionally degrading words such as jealous, insecure and controlling to deflect their wrongdoing.  From where I stand, all I can see is a man trying to protect his relationship.

On the other hand, she did offer up her phone to you.  If she thought there were any pictures or messages in her phone that would jeopardize your relationship, I don’t think she would be so willing.  It may all be harmless like she says, and she may not be clear on boundaries.  That’s something to consider as well.

In any case, the picture is inappropriate.  Her response should not have been to attack your character.  Instead, she should have apologized and worked to dispel any doubt you may have.

Walk good,
#TeamWISY

2 comments:

  1. Nice try. She gave him the phone hoping that he wouldn't find that photo. Now saying that he's jealous and controlling is just an effort to make him feel that he's making something out of nothing. Brother.... start using a condom with her just for your protection.

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  2. Bruh, the gut never lies. The heart is weak and the head will rationalize but if she really had nothing to hide you should be able to surf her phone without supervision. Do you even know what to look for? Listen to your gut,she's deflecting.

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