I recently started dating a guy from Milan. Everything is great, but I don't speak Italian, and he speaks Italian to his friends and family around me. It makes me uncomfortable because I don't know what they're saying and I'm completely excluded from the conversation. Whenever I ask him what they're talking about, he tells me it's nothing but turns right around and starts laughing with them as if he told them something funny about me. I've expressed how unhappy this makes me and he tells me I'm being silly. How can I learn Italian quickly? Also, what do you suggest I do to get him to see my point?
I have another question. I have issues with our sex life. He wants to have sex in public places a lot. Whenever we go out, he asks me to meet him in the bathroom for a quickie. I think that's weird behavior. He really likes public affection and then gets so turned on that he needs to relieve himself. What do you think about that? Is that natural?
Signed,
Bella
📷: StockSnap - pixabay.com
WISY's Advice:
Dear Bella,
I think it's rude and inconsiderate of your man to allow a language barrier to exist in your relationship. He should be doing everything he can to diminish any barriers and make an extra effort to include you in group conversation. He should be translating if his family and friends don't speak English. If they do, he should insist that you be included in the conversation, and he should be the one to teach you Italian. Have another conversation with him about the issue. If he still thinks you're being silly then it's a sign that he doesn't respect you. No relationship can last without respect.
On to the other issue: If public sex is not your thing then you also need to be very vocal and clear about your feelings with that. It's not a case of what's natural and unnatural, it's a case of preference. He prefers it, you don't.
It seems as if you're relationship is unbalanced. Your guy is holding the reins and you have little to no say. Either stand up for yourself or leave.
Walk good,
#TeamWISY
Y'all ain't compatible. Period. Full stop. He is sexually adventurous and free, and, well you're not. Find common ground or you'll both be frustrated.
ReplyDeleteLearn the language or stop complaining. Ask him to teach you words so you 2 can communicate. Stop being paranoid.
This what not paying attention to the signs/red flags look like hunting?
ReplyDelete