My Sister is a Disappointment

Dear WISY,

I am facing a very difficult situation right now.  I currently live with my sister and her husband.  I traveled here from my country for my education and I have noticed a lot of things that our family back home would not be proud of.  My sister has become too American.  She is doing things that are not permitted in our country and our family.  She is allowing other women to raise her children because she is working long hours as an attorney, she is making more money than her husband, and she is also keeping alcohol in her home.  These are things that my wife cannot do when I am married.  I am so disappointed in my sister.  Apart from that, my sister's husband is a womanizer.  He is always on social media flirting with beautiful women.  I believe my sister is to blame because she doesn't have time for her husband.  She rather work.  This American culture is ruining my sister.

I want to tell her to revert back to our customs, but I know that she will ask me to leave her home.  I cannot do that because I am currently completing my studies.  Every time my parents ask about my experiences, I lie and tell them that my sister would make them proud.  I do not want to continue lying.  Should I tell my parents the truth?  I will risk them coming to America to correct her faults.

Please advise me well.

Signed,

Concerned Brother

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WISY's Advice:

Dear Concerned Brother,

I can understand how this change in custom may be disturbing to you, but I'd like to personally welcome you to America, where people are free to do whatever they please.  Your sister is no longer obligated to follow your country's and family's traditions.  If her life bothers you so much, you should find alternative housing.  Stop trying to tell people what to do in their own space, in their own marriage, and ultimately in their lives.

Your views are sexist and not welcome among many in this country.  I hope your education here will help you realize that.  You should be proud of your sister's success and applaud her instead of tearing her down and blaming her for her husband's behavior.  Stay out of married folks' business.  If they see it fit, they will work on their issues.  Go study your school work and stop studying your adult sister's business.

Walk good,

#TeamWISY