In Love with a Rasta Man

Dear WISY, 

I am young, too young to be on my own but I am seriously wanting to leave my parent’s house and go live in the hills with my boyfriend and his family.  My parents raised me in the church and my boyfriend'’s family is Rastafarian.  Our beliefs are similar but my parents think that Rasta people do not care enough about their appearance and they hate dread locks.  Me, personally, I love dread locks and I love to see when my lion takes off his hat and those long dreads flow down his back.  It gives me chills.  I just wish my parents would accept him.  It would make life so much easier for us.  His parents accept me and invite me to visit them all the time but I can’'t say the same for my parents.  

I can tell he is getting frustrated with the situation.  He loves me but he doesn'’t love the disrespect he gets from my family.  He feels bad about meeting me secretly and really I feel that he doesn'’t deserve to be treated this way either.  He is my king and I want to show him how much I respect him.  I will be 18 in a few months but I don’t have a job and I'’m still in school.  I don’t know if it’'s a good idea to leave home even though my heart is telling me to go.  We love each other and I don’t want to lose him.  What should I do? 

Signed,
Rasta Lover

WISY's Response:

Dear Rasta Lover,

Religious beliefs aside, I think you already know the potential struggle you will endure if you leave your parents' house; you are still a student and you cannot support yourself financially.  How will you support yourself elsewhere?  Do not assume that your boyfriend's family will take you in with no expectations in return.  I know at this age, love seemingly conquers all and living happily ever after with your boyfriend and his family may seem like the perfect escape from your parents and their judgmental ways.  However, you are still so young and I would hate for you to make a decision which you may regret later in life.  

Also, be clear that you are in love with your boyfriend but that doesn't necessarily mean you will be in love with the Rastafarian lifestyle.  Are you aware of everything that entails?  It may mean a total shift in lifestyle.  Are you ready to change everything that has been the norm for you your entire life?

Take your time.  You haven't even begun to experience life and all it has to offer.  For now, talk to your parents and try to clarify any misconceptions they may have.  Maybe both families can get together and come to an understanding.  Who knows, your parents may have a change of heart.  In any case, I think your first concern should be to complete your education then once you can financially support yourself, you can be free to love who you want.

Walk good,

#TeamWISY