Please help me out. I don't usually write to people for advice, but my girlfriend is very lazy these days. When we met, she was always ready to make love but now she's never in the mood. This isn't the first time it's happening to me. I left my ex for the same reason. What do women need to stay the same and why do women change so much once they get a man? She doesn't understand that I have no problems moving on to someone more exciting. She needs to change. Honestly, I like her a lot and I can see myself with her long-term. I want her to help me want to stay with her. Help a brother out!
Signed,
Help Me Help Her
WISY's Advice:
Dear HMHH,
I'll answer you as best as I can from a woman's perspective. If this isn't the first time this is happening to you then you probably have a lot more to do with your woman's change than you think.
Ask yourself a few questions before you start projecting fault on her:
Is your behavior the same as when you first met?
Are you doing the things you used to do that would keep her in the love making mood?
Has your appearance changed?
Do you have repulsive habits?
If it's not you then maybe there are some issues which are causing stress in her life. Stress seriously decreases libido. Have you communicated with her? Have you asked if there's something bothering her? If you want a long-term relationship, you need to learn this woman. Delve into her emotions to find out what elevates her to her highs and what makes her plummet. I can almost guarantee a shift in her mood if you become more involved in her emotional side.
Relationships are work, brother. Get to it.
Walk good,
#TeamWISY
What do you do to get her in the mood? Is she sick or stressed out? Sometimes it's the little things that count. Try something new or go back to what worked in the beginning. Here's a rogue idea: Express your concerns to her the way you did this anonymous website. Sometimes telling a person how you feel gives them the opportunity to make changes. That is all. Carry on.
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